The Bleeding Heart Show
by alibi2014
Summary: When the most important person in your life is taken what do you do? And what do you do when they come back?
1. Lost and Found

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Teen Titans. But I did get some TT stuff for Hanukkah. **

**Note: From where it's marked as a flashback, it continues as a flashback through the end of the chapter. It'll go back to present time sometime in the next chapter.**

* * *

Rain poured down from the sky, mixing with the dirt ground to form mud and leaving a damp chill in the air. On a hill just outside of the city, a lone girl stood in the cemetery. The grave she stood at was fresh, the dirt covering the coffin not yet covered with grass. She held an umbrella to keep herself dry, but a few scattered drops of rain still fell on her, dampening her coat and her long red hair. Tears pooled in her emerald green eyes as she read, for the hundredth time, the headstone that had been erected only a couple of hours earlier. 

Robin

1989-2006

Brave Leader

True Friend

Brushing away her tears, Starfire smiled sadly. It was true, she had never felt such a loss in her life. Robin, her best friend, the only boy she would ever love, had died. She felt an emptiness in the pit of her stomach that words could not describe. There were so many things she had never said, and now they would be left unsaid for all eternity. She had never told him she loved him, had never known his real name, had never even seen him with his mask off. But certain things didn't need to be stated verbally to be explained. The look in their eyes every time they had locked had been enough.

But although she felt like half of her was gone, a strange content feeling was also washing over her. Yes, he was gone, but now he wouldn't have to fight anymore. Now he wouldn't have to feel guilt over things he had no control over. Now she would always know where to find him. And now she would never have to lose him again.

**Flashback: One year earlier**

It had been strangely quiet around the Tower lately. Quiet because Jump City was quiet, and strange because Jump City was _never_ quiet. Individually the Titans often asked themselves how a single city such as Jump could have so many villains. It wasn't like Jump was so different from any other city of its size; it had its bad areas, but it also had its better neighborhoods. But there seemed to be something about the city that attracted all sorts of bad guys, ranging from world-threatening madmen to small-time crooks. It was all the Titans could do to keep up with the constant flow of theft and violence that swept through the city.

So it was odd that for almost three weeks there had been just two bank robberies. At first Robin had been suspicious, or at least more suspicious than usual. Someone must be planning something, he told the rest of the Titans. Probably Slade. For three weeks there had been constant guard duty around the Tower, waiting for the plot to unfold. And for three weeks nothing had happened. And then came the 22nd day.

Starfire remembered that that day had been sunny. She remembered because she had been determined that morning to get Robin out of the Tower, to get him out of his constantly worrying state of mind. But she remembered something else about that day as well. When she had encountered Raven early that morning the empath had seemed preoccupied, and when Starfire asked her if everything was okay, Raven had answered strangely.

"Something isn't right. Something bad is going to happen." Star had pressed for details but that was all Raven's vision had come up with. Something bad.

Looking back, the morning passed in a blur. Cyborg made breakfast, Beast Boy made bad jokes, and Robin didn't come out of his room. And then the alarm went off.

No matter how many times she heard it, the alarm always sent Starfire jumping, its shrill scream and red lights sending a shiver down her spine. No sooner had the alarm began to scream than Robin had come racing out of his room.

"Report! What's the problem?" Cyborg sat at the computer monitor, typing away, drawing up a picture of the crime scene. He sat there silently for a moment, and everyone knew what was coming.

"Cyborg! What's going on?"

"It's him." And without even mentioning Slade's name, Robin was already out the door.

"Titans! Go!"

Reaching the old warehouse, Starfire let go of Robin's wrist, setting him down gently. "It looks like he's been here for a while," said Beast Boy, as they observed the wreckage already induced on the old building. Robin paid no attention to the comment.

"Search for survivors." The words had hardly left Robin's mouth when a swarm of Slade's robots descended on them. From out of the shadows came hundreds of them, and somehow in the craziness of the battle, Robin and Starfire had become separated from the rest of the Titans.

For a time they fought side by side, scattering the robots and helping each other watch their backs. When a lull came in the fighting he took a moment to flash her a smile.

"Don't give up," the look said. "We can do this." And then things went bad fast.

One of the robots, one that looked just like the rest but whose image would always be etched into Starfire's mind, threw a small disc at the ground in between the two Titans, and the resulting explosion was powerful enough to send them flying in opposite directions. Star hit the wall behind her and slid to the floor. Her head was already beginning to throb but she pushed herself up and shakily took a step forward before she saw what was happening on the other side of the room.

A robot was advancing on Robin, who had managed to clear the wall and was standing in a ready position. Somehow, she didn't know how, Starfire knew it was the same robot that had thrown the disc.

"He doesn't seem to like hand to hand combat," Star thought to herself as the robot threw an orb the size of a quarter towards Robin.

Revving up her starbolts, Starfire made to fly over to him, but was sidetracked by another band of the seemingly endless supply of robots. As she fought them she tried to spot Robin but found a cloud of smoke had formed around him, probably from the bomb. As the smoke began to clear Star caught sight of her friend and, sending a few more starbolts towards the enemy, flew over to fight by his side.

As a group of particularly savage robots began closing in on them, Robin pulled out a handful of bombs and flung them out in front of him, sending robots flying into the air and a wall collapsing, blocking their way out.

When the dust settled, Robin came back into Starfire's view, and she could see he was already trying to work his way through the wreckage to get back to the other Titans. She flew over to help him and together they lifted fallen beams and rubble, all the while listening to the fight going on on the other side of the wall.

She was trying so hard to move through the rubble that she almost didn't notice that Robin had stopped. He seemed to be staring off into space, staring at something in a far corner of the room. But when she looked over in the direction of his gaze she saw nothing there.

"Robin?" She was answered with silence; only the sound of their breathing could be heard.

Cautiously Starfire moved around so that she was standing in front of him and inhaled sharply. There was something wrong. His eyes seemed dull, and his breathing shallow. She put her hand in front of his face and moved it from side to side, watching to see if his eyes followed, and when they didn't she took his hand in hers, feeling it was cold even through their gloves. She was contemplating what to do when he collapsed in her arms. Immediately she pulled out her communicator. She was so preoccupied that she didn't even remember her friends had been in battle just a moment ago.

"Star? Where are you guys? The robots are gone- they left just like that." Starfire didn't look at her communicator, her eyes held captive on Robin's.

"Cyborg, we need help." Starfire's worried voice caught Cyborg's attention.

"Where are you?" He repeated.

"A wall collapsed. We are behind it."

"Okay. We're coming." A moment later a loud bang was followed by a hole emerging in the fallen debris. Through the smoke Star could see Cyborg lowering his sonic cannon. When Cyborg, along with Beast Boy and Raven, made their way over to Starfire and Robin they could tell immediately that something was wrong.

"Starfire, what happened?" Raven asked, kneeling down and looking Robin over.

"We were fighting and became separated. I tried to get back to him but could not. One of the robots threw something at him, threw a bomb at him. There was so much smoke- but he seemed uninjured. And then I looked at him again and he was… like this."

"They threw a smoke bomb at him?" said Beast Boy. "What, does he have asthma or something?" Raven glared at him before Cyborg said, "We have to get him back to the Tower."

Starfire nodded, still not understanding what was happening. Putting one arm behind Robin's neck and the other under his knees, she picked him up and flew out of the warehouse, back towards the Tower. In front of her Raven led the way back, her hood pulled over her head, and in back of them Beast Boy had become a pterodactyl and was carrying Cyborg on his back.

As she flew Starfire tried not to think about what was happening but questions surged through her head. _What was in that bomb? Was it meant just for him? Is he seriously hurt?_ The question of whether or not he would survive never even crossed her mind.

Upon reaching the Tower Star brought Robin to the infirmary and set him down on a bed. A second later Cyborg, Beast Boy, and Raven walked in. The three of them looked over Robin once more before Cyborg and Raven turned to each other and began to talk medicine. Now Starfire felt helpless- she knew little about medicine and knew that for Robin's sake she should leave the healing to Cyborg and Raven.

"Hey, Star." She turned and saw Beast Boy pointing towards the door. "Why don't we go wait upstairs?" For a second she was torn; should she stay by Robin's side and watch helplessly as he was examined or should she leave the room- leave him? Starfire smiled weakly.

"Let us go up the stairs and wait."

Beast Boy led the way to the elevator and Starfire followed him, staring at the floor. When she looked up Beast Boy was smiling at her.

"Don't worry, Star. He'll be okay." Starfire didn't answer but followed him into the living room where they sat in silence for an hour and a half, waiting for a sign that they should go back.

They got that sign in Cyborg rushing into the room, looking frantic.

"Guys, we need to talk." At the words Starfire's heart quickened. She had learned from experience that "We need to talk" was code for "We have bad news." And of all the things to have bad news about, the health of one of her teammates, particularly Robin, was the worst.

She didn't wait for Cyborg to lead them back to where Robin was; instead she flew ahead, opening the door to find Robin hooked up to various monitors, a screen on the table next to him showing his heart rate and other statistics that she couldn't read. Raven was standing beside the bed, her hood down around her shoulders, looking at the screens intently. When Starfire opened the door she turned around, and the look on her face told Starfire everything she needed to know.

"He is not going to wake up." Starfire put it as a statement, not a question, but Raven shook her head anyway. At the confirmation Starfire collapsed into a chair next to the bed and took Robin's hand, willing the tears to come, but they didn't, not yet.

At the sound of footsteps entering the room Starfire looked up. When her eyes locked on Beast Boy's, the shape shifter's shoulders slumped and he gestured at Robin as he spoke.

"So… What happened?"

Cyborg had stopped in the doorway as if at any moment he would turn and leave this scene behind, but now he walked in and closed the door.

"We're not sure exactly what was in that bomb," he started, avoiding Starfire's eyes, "But whatever it was, it's shutting down his system. His heart, lungs, brain…" He sighed. "He's not gonna make it."

"We've attached him to a machine that will breathe for him, but his heart's failing and once his brain goes…" Raven trailed off. "There's nothing we'll be able to do."

Starfire's eyes were locked on Robin's closed eyes, pleading with them to open. She spoke softly, without raising her gaze from his face. "How long?"

Raven and Cyborg turned towards each other, trying to decide what to say. Cyborg spoke up first. "He's going quickly, Star. Its only been two hours and already," he motioned at the monitors next to the bed, the lines on the screens jumping up and down and dancing wildly with his heartbeat and artificial breathing, "We can't be sure but it's happening fast."

"And there's nothing you can do? Nothing at all?" Beast Boy's eyes pleaded with Raven's and Cyborg's.

"I can't keep him alive, I can just keep him from feeling any pain," Raven said quietly. "And I've been trying to do that but I don't think he can feel anything anyway."

"We've done everything we can, B." Cyborg assured him.

There was silence for a moment, and all eyes were on Starfire, who was aware not of anyone else in the room but Robin, who was slowly fading away from her. So she hardly noticed when Raven motioned towards the door and led Beast Boy and Cyborg out. And, finally alone, Starfire broke down and cried.

**T-B-H-S**

The funeral was three days later. Cyborg had persuaded Starfire to go get some sleep around midnight, and six hours later she had awoken to the sound of an alarm going off, an alarm signaling heart and brain failure, and had arrived in the room just in time to see him take his last breaths. She hadn't even thought about the fact that by that time he was no longer breathing on his own anyway.

Cyborg and Raven had said they didn't know how long he would last, but even they were shocked at how fast everything had happened. In the space of just eighteen hours Robin had contracted and died from a poison that was still as mysterious to the Titans as it had been at the beginning.

Starfire had arrived first in Robin's room, and had known as she watched him that it was over. Still, she waited for Raven to actually say it before leaving.

"I'm sorry, Starfire. He's gone." Star had nodded and walked out of the room, down the hallway, to the elevators, and had not stopped walking until she had reached her bedroom, where she collapsed on her bed and broke down in tears. For the next couple of days she refused to speak to anyone, so Robin's funeral had been planned without her, but still according to what he would have wanted. It wasn't flashy or expensive, and there were few attendants. After all, how many people knew Robin personally?

She had cried quietly during the service, tears streaming down her face. And when it was over and the rest of the team had started to leave, she asked for a few minutes alone. She stood there and read the headstone quietly to herself.

Robin

1989-2005

Courageous Leader

True Friend

After a few minutes she had taken one last look at the headstone, wiped the tears from her cheeks, and walked down to where the T-car was parked. No one spoke on the ride home.

**T-B-H-S**

The next day the alarm rang out in the Tower. At first Starfire had thought it was the alarm from the infirmary, and had jumped out of her seat and turned towards the elevators before realizing what it really was. If anything, the red light flashing throughout the entire Tower could have told her that it was merely the alarm signifying a villain in town.

She hadn't wanted to go, had wanted to just stay at home and sit in the quiet of the empty Tower, but the team had insisted it would be good for her. "To get your mind off of him." But the real reason she was going was that she knew he would have wanted her to. He would have insisted she live her life without him and continue to protect the city. So, following Cyborg's lead in the T-car, she had flown out of the Tower and into the bright day.

Arriving at the scene of the crime, a factory on the outskirts of Jump City, Starfire gave her all to the fight, smacking Plasmus with starbolt after starbolt, and giving him a few swift kicks in the back. She had thought she would be too upset to fight, but having someone to take her anger out on felt good, and in just twenty minutes Plasmus was down.

The team huddled around the fallen form of Plasmus, who had reverted to his human self and was sleeping deeply, if not peacefully. Her face locked in an angry glare at their fallen enemy, Star felt a hand on her shoulder and turned to see Cyborg.

"Come on. Let's go home." They turned to leave, each one of them feeling a little strange after undergoing their first fight without Robin, when something caught Starfire's eye. In the human-Plasmus's hand was a disc, a disc with a blinking red light on it. Starfire broke off from the group and flew over to Plasmus, pulling the disc out of his hand and inspecting it closely. The disc was just about the size of Star's hand and was silver metal save for the red light in the center.

"Hey, Starfire, let's go," Beast Boy called over to her. Pocketing the disc, Star flew back to her friends and followed them silently back to the Tower. She didn't know why, but for some reason she thought it best not to tell them about the disc.

**T-B-H-S**

That night Starfire couldn't sleep. She had been having trouble ever since the night they had brought Robin to the infirmary but tonight was different. Tonight she couldn't sleep not because of a waterfall of tears threatening to drown her if she lay down but because she couldn't stop thinking of the disc. She thought, no she _knew,_ that it was somehow related to Robin's unnatural and distressing death. So at two in the morning, when she could no longer hear the sounds of Beast Boy and Cyborg playing video games and could no longer discern Raven meditating, Starfire got dressed and slipped out her window, into the cool night air. In her left hand she clutched the disc.

Star didn't know where she was going, didn't even know what she was looking for. But after a little while of fruitless searching she realized something: The disc in her hand, the disc that had been blinking at a slow pace since she had first acquired it, was starting to blink more rapidly.

Star stopped flying and lowered herself to the ground, never taking her eyes off the light on the disc, and started to walk slowly down the street. As she walked the light increased its blinking seemingly with every step she took, until finally it was blinking so quickly that Starfire knew it had reached its maximum. But she was still confused, not to mention she still didn't know what she was looking for. When the light reached its maximum speed Star stopped walking and looked up at her surroundings. And she gasped.

Without noticing it, Starfire had ended up staring at the entrance of a warehouse, the same warehouse in which Robin had collapsed right in front of her eyes. Now she was sure of it: This disc, whatever it was, whatever it meant, was most certainly connected to Robin's murderers.

Starfire shuddered and took a step forward. As soon as she did so a glaring search light turned on, momentarily blinding her. Putting an arm in front of her eyes to shield herself from the bright yellow light, Star looked around, trying to see who, if anyone, was there. After a few cursory glances around she started walking again. The Tamaranian wasn't entirely sure that she was alone, but she didn't really care one way or the other: Either she would find out what had happened to Robin or she would die trying.

As Starfire entered the warehouse she felt her heart pick up speed. Figuring it was just because she was returning to the scene of the crime, Star paid little attention to it. Only when she was deep into the building did she realize something felt… strange, almost forewarning. Something was pulling her forward, willing her to walk onward. Star's heartbeat got faster and faster until she felt she might collapse. It was then that she saw it, on the ground, not twenty feet in front of her. It could have been a pile of clothing, except that she swore she could see it moving, almost as if it were breathing. And the colors looked so familiar. Those greens, reds, and yellows, and-

"Robin!" Starfire gasped.

* * *

A/N: My first posted chapter fic! I'm pretty excited. The chapters aren't going to be very long, but I'll try to post every four days or so. I hope you liked it! Read and review, but no flames- thanks! 


	2. How?

**Disclaimer: Gosh, you know, it's crazy, I _still _don't own Teen Titans.**

**Note: This chapter is a continuation of the flashback from chapter 1**

* * *

For a second time stopped, and Starfire felt sure she felt her heart stop as well. But as quickly as it had begun it was over, and Star ran as fast as she could over to the body that she knew to be her leader and best friend. As soon as she was next to him she dropped down to her knees and rolled him over so that he was no longer on his side, facing away from her, but on his back. His eyes were closed; clearly he was unconscious, but equally clear was the fact that he was breathing- the fact that he was _alive_. 

Star shook him gently by the shoulder, hoping to wake him, but she saw that although he was alive he was in critical condition. Robin's sleeves were ripped to reveal deep gashes on his arms, a dark spot had formed on the side of his stomach, his leg looked to be bent back at an odd angle, though not broken, maybe just dislocated, and his cape was no where to be found. She needed to get him back to the Tower, and fast.

It was only after she had gathered him in her arms, much as she had done the last time they had left the warehouse, that she broke down. Flying back towards the Tower, tears streamed down Star's cheeks and she gripped Robin closer to her. She cried from happiness, but more from relief. Because in her heart she knew, had always known, that she would never truly believe that Robin had died.

When Starfire arrived in front of the Tower at around four thirty in the morning, she realized she had no idea how she was going to tell everyone the news. It hadn't been all that surprising to her; she had read somewhere that when someone especially close to you dies you stay in denial for a while before admitting to yourself the loss. She realized that deep down she probably had never accepted what had happened. But the others, while still very close to Robin, didn't have the same sort of relationship with him that Starfire had. As she walked to the door, carrying Robin in her arms, she wasn't sure how they would react.

After closing the front door quietly behind her, Starfire took a look around the living room. The TV was on, and from what she could see the only person in the room was a half-asleep Beast Boy. Star cleared her throat and Beast Boy spoke without turning around.

"Having trouble sleeping, too?" When she didn't answer, Beast Boy went on. "I was having crazy insomnia so I said 'screw it' and decided to watch some TV."

"Beast Boy," Starfire said quietly. "I require your assistance." Now the changeling began to turn around.

"Star, what's the-" When his eyes fell on the limp figure of Robin in Starfire's arms his eyes widened and he lost his ability to speak. But only for a moment.

"Beast Boy, please, I need-"

"What the hell! Starfire, what is going on? Is that who I think it is?"

"Robin is alive. I found him at the warehouse. Please, he needs help." Beast Boy just stood there, unable to believe what he was seeing or hearing. Much as he wished Robin _would_ come back to life, he had lost enough people to know that that wasn't possible.

"How? How is that Robin? How is he alive?"

Starfire sighed. "I do not know. I found him. I know this is strange but it is true. I will explain how I found him later, but now, he _needs_ help."

Finally Beast Boy nodded. "Alright. Get him into the infirmary. I'll get Cy and Raven." With that the two parted ways, one of them dashing for the wing of the Tower where he would find their sleeping teammates, the other flying as fast as she could in the hopes of restoring the life of someone she loved.

When Starfire got to the infirmary she put Robin down on one of the beds, making sure not to use the same one that he had supposedly died in. For a moment she stood in silence, watching Robin inhale and exhale. When she heard the sound of footsteps she turned to see a very confused Cyborg.

He had stopped in the doorway, his mouth hanging open and his eyes wide, looking much like Beast Boy had a few minutes ago. When he finally found his vocal cords again, he could do nothing but stutter.

"How…? How did he…?"

"Cyborg, let's go." Raven teleported up through the floor, and had begun walking swiftly over to Robin. "If he's alive we need to work fast."

"How do we know that's even the real Robin?" Cyborg asked, taking hesitant steps forward.

"Even if it's not it's our duty to help him. But it _is _Robin. I can tell." The empath proceeded to hook him up to the same machines that had been used just days ago. Again, Starfire stood back and let Raven and Cyborg, who had finally found the ability to use his limbs again, take over.

"Where did you find him, Starfire?" Raven's voice still held its usual monotone, but Starfire could hear the excitement in it, too.

"At the warehouse."

"Why did you go back there?" Cyborg had finished connecting electrodes to Robin's temples and took a quick glance at Starfire before fiddling with the controls on a screen next to the bed.

"I found a… disc."

"A disc?" Beast Boy asked. He had collapsed into a chair, and his insomnia finally seemed to be fading, as his eyes and posture sagged.

Starfire sighed. She told them about how she had found the disc and had decided not to tell anyone else about it, and about how she had held onto it and then used it as a sort of tracker to find Robin.

When she was finished, Cyborg walked over to a desk in the corner of the room and took out an ink pad and a pad of paper. "I'm testing his fingerprints, just to make sure it's him. I don't want to get out hopes up and then find out it's another one of Slade's tricks." Cyborg picked up Robin's hand, pressed the pad of each finger into the ink one at a time, pressing it onto the paper afterwards. Then he pressed a button on his arm and a soft blue glow shone out, underneath which he held the card, print side up.

"It's a scanner. I've got samples of all our prints in case something… ever happened." They all knew he had been going to say "Something like this," but never before had they suspected something like this would occur.

Cyborg's arm beeped and he turned the scanner off and looked at the small screen that was displaying Robin's picture, height, weight, and blood type. Cyborg smiled. "This is our guy." Starfire, Beast Boy, and Raven nodded, but they had known from the moment they set eyes on him that that was Robin, the _real_ Robin.

"So now what?" Beast Boy asked, his chin resting on his fist.

Raven sighed. "Now we wait."

"He's breathing and his organs are functioning, but he's not waking up. It looks a little like a coma, but not a deep one. I guess he should wake up soon." Cyborg shrugged, showing that he knew little more about the situation than anyone else did.

"I will wait with him tonight." Starfire spoke quietly and her voice surprised the rest of the team; she hadn't said anything since explaining how she had come to find Robin.

"Starfire, why don't you get some sleep? It looks like he's going to be fine." Raven said. But Starfire shook her head.

"I will be fine here. When he wakes I will call you." Cyborg, Raven, and Beast Boy glanced at each other, knowing they had just been dismissed.

"We'll be upstairs if you need us, Star," Cyborg said as he turned towards the door. He didn't really want to let Starfire stay, but he also didn't want to force her to leave. As he got into the elevator and pushed the button to go up, he realized that in times like these Starfire acted much the way Robin did when he was stressed: Reclusive, inflexible, unable to listen to reason. Stepping out of the elevator he shrugged. It wasn't true what they said about opposites attracting. Robin and Starfire may have seemed different to a passerby but on the inside they were exactly the same: Determined and stubborn.

It was only once Cyborg, Beast Boy, and Raven had entered the living room and were standing in front of a window overlooking the dark bay that it hit them: Robin was back. Cyborg grinned when he heard Beast Boy gasp, and the two looked at each other with pure joy on their faces. Raven smiled a little before trying only semi successfully to stop, but the look in her eyes remained the same. Later they would delve deeper into trying to figure out how Robin had returned, but for now they let the new found feeling of hope and gratitude wash over them

In the infirmary, Starfire sat in the chair next to Robin's bed. Her hands were folded in her lap and her eyes were locked on Robin's face. She realized he looked more peaceful now than he ever had before, and wondered if it would not be better to keep him in this state forever. She would always know where to find him, he would be out of danger, and he would be content. Much later, she would rue those thoughts.

As minutes passed by, Star found her gaze drifting slowly around the room, resting on random objects. The room was so bare, she realized, the walls and beds white, the machines grey, and few windows. When her eyes came to the window she noticed the sky was changing from black to pink as the sun emerged from behind the mountains. Slowly, she got up from her chair and walked over to the window, folding her arms around herself as she walked.

Outside, a tree obscured her view of the horizon, but the pink and orange smudge on the sky quickly outweighed the black sheet of night, and eventually the sky became the bright blue of day. Her attention was held so strongly by the sky that she jumped when she heard words directed at her.

"Star… Where am I?"

**T-B-H-S**

Starfire gasped and turned around, and at first she was unable to move or speak.

"Starfire?" His voice raspy, his eyes open but groggy, Robin struggled to prop himself up on the bed despite the jumble of wires surrounding him. When he spoke again Star felt her ability to speak and move restored.

"Robin," She said quietly and walked back over to him, her speed doubling with every step she took. When she got to the chair next to him she sat down and gently pushed him back so that he was lying flat again.

"Star, where am I? What's going on?" The look on his face was one of overwhelming fatigue and complete confusion.

"Robin," Starfire repeated, unsure of what to say. What do you say to the person who you care more about than you care about yourself, who has just returned from the dead? "How do you feel?"

"Uh, tired. I'm really tired. But why am I here? What happened?"

Starfire didn't know what to tell him and thought she should wait until the others arrived to fill him in on the past few days, so she continued to ask him questions. "What is the last thing you remember, Robin?" She couldn't seem to stop saying his name. It was as if each time she said it made it surer that he was back.

"I remember… We were fighting in a warehouse. We got separated from the others. We were fighting and… and we got separated. We tried to get out of the room and then… I wake up here." He smiled weakly as if to make up for his lack of memory. "But it looks like it's six or seven in the morning," He said, gesturing outside. "So I must've been out for what? Twenty-two hours?"

Hearing his estimate of how long he had been "unconscious," Starfire found she couldn't hold it in any longer and began to cry.

"Starfire? What's wrong? What happened?" In response the Tamaranian pulled out her communicator and dialed Cyborg. As soon as he answered he saw her face and his started to look grim. But when Star smiled he understood and within moments the other Titans were in the room.

"Good to have you back, man," Cyborg said as he walked across the room. "We were worried about you."

"Worried? We were a little beyond worried. We thought we'd never see you again!" Beast Boy exclaimed.

"Guys… I really don't understand what's going on here," Robin said, again trying to sit up.

"I have not yet told him what has happened. I thought it best to wait until we were all here together." Starfire said. Now she was rethinking if that had been the best tactic. Being told you've mysteriously returned from the dead would be bad enough, but to listen to four people tell you might be a little overwhelming. There was silence for a minute, as the four standing Titans contemplated who should tell him, and how to tell him. Finally Raven spoke up.

"Robin, you've been… Out of commission the past four days."

"Four days? Was I in a coma or something?" Robin asked, touching the back of his head as if to make sure he was complete.

"A little more than that. You were kind of…" Cyborg trailed off and Starfire sighed before picking it up.

"Robin, you have died and returned to life."

**T-B-H-S**

By the time Starfire had told the story and Robin had finished asking questions, two hours had passed. Robin was sitting on the edge of the medical bed, his legs thrown over the side. It was as far as he was able to get on the way to standing before the others had told him he was in danger of injuring himself. Now he felt the fatigue coming back, and he struggled to keep his eyes open. Cyborg had explained that for the next few days he would probably feel very tired, as his body had been working overtime to try and pull out of the deep sleep he had been in when Star had found him.

"Alright guys, let's clear out. And Robin," The boy wonder looked up when he heard Cyborg say his name. "I don't want you jumping up every time the alarm goes off. We can handle things for a few days." Robin nodded, too tired to argue, but in the back of his head he knew he wouldn't last even two days just sitting in the infirmary.

Starfire was the last one to leave. As she opened the door she heard her name being called for the second time that day.

"Starfire, wait." She turned around to see Robin still sitting on the edge of the bed. She smiled and walked back over to him.

"You should try to sleep."

Robin looked up and laughed.

"I won't need to try very hard. I'm exhausted. But, I wanted to say thank you. Thank you for finding me."

Starfire smiled again. "And thank you, Robin, for waking up." She turned back to the window as she continued. "I was very sad when I thought I would never see you again."

"I'm sorry."

Glancing over at him, Star said, "Sorry? Why are you sorry?"

"I'm sorry for making you sad. For making all of you worry. You shouldn't have to be worried for me. If I really do die, I know you'll be strong enough to stay together."

Starfire wiped a tear from her eye. "You should sleep now." She turned to walk back to the door, and as she opened it, she heard Robin walk up behind her. Before she could tell him to sit back down, he kissed her on the cheek, whispered "Thank you," and closed the door after her.

**End Flashback**

* * *

Well, guys, that was chapter two. I hope you liked it. Thanks so much to everyone who reveiwed chapter one. 

Read and reveiw- thanks!


	3. Second Time's a Charm

**Disclaimer: Yeah, no, I own nothing. See I was going to be all witty and say "But if I did own TT Star and Robin would already have kissed," but now they _have _kissed!**

**Thank you _so much _to everyone who has reviewed.I know that last chapter confused some of you. I'll try to explain a little now but I don't want to give things away, so bear with me and after the chapter is over I'll explain some more.**

**Chapter One starts with Star standing at Robin's grave, which is only a couple hours old (notice how the gravestones had different dates). Then in a flashback we see Robin die and a few days later he is buriedand comes back. When the flashback ends in chapter 2 Starfire is still at Robin's grave. Which means... Well, I can't say more for now, but I'll see you again at the end of the chapter.**

**And one more thing: No matter what anyone tells you, this chapter is not repetetive! Okay, maybe a little, but- No! It's not! I actually have somewhere I'm going!**

* * *

By a month after Robin had come back, things had gone relatively back to normal. Robin had been confined to the infirmary for three days, and when he threatened to run away if they didn't let him leave, he was allowed to spend the next week recuperating in his room. Starfire and Beast Boy had brought Robin meals and kept him company, while Cyborg and Raven worked on figuring out what exactly had happened. There were so many questions running through their minds that they had been forced to make a list: _How had Robin died and come back to life?_ _How had he gotten from his coffin to the warehouse? How had he survived in the coffin? Had Slade meant to kill Robin with that bomb? What was in the bomb? _The day after Robin woke up Cyborg had driven out to the cemetery and found Robin's gravesite looking much the same as it had been when he had last seen it. Because the dirt had not yet had a chance to settle, the fact that it had been newly dug up and reset didn't look strange. That is, until Cyborg dug up the coffin and found that, of course, Robin was no longer inside it. 

Before long they ran out of leads, leaving many questions unanswered. There had been no fingerprints on the coffin, leading them to believe it had been the work of one of Slade's robots. As to what was in the bomb, all traces of it had disappeared, leaving them with nothing to evaluate. And because Robin had been unconscious from the time he first passed out until when he woke up in the Tower, Raven was unable to look at his memories for guidance. Eventually they came to the conclusion that while Robin's death had purposefully been faked, the Titans were probably not supposed to have found him again. But other than their guesses and speculations, nothing more of the crime was ever uncovered.

**T-B-H-S**

**Back in the Present**

Still standing in front of Robin's gravestone, Starfire noticed the rain had stopped. The sky was still overcast and the wind still blew strongly, but the drops of water falling from the sky had finally ceased, and with them also her tears. Recalling Robin's words from the first time he had "died" Starfire took a deep breath and steadied herself. It had been two days since his death, and now she needed to be strong. The team needed to be strong. Taking a last look at the headstone, Starfire smiled slightly and turned to walk back to the T-car where her friends were waiting.

The writing on his gravestone was different this time than it had been the first time. A month after Starfire had found Robin, he had asked what had been written on the headstone, and when she told him he laughed.

"Courageous leader?" He said. "It sounds like an army general or something. I'm not courageous," He said, shaking his head.

"Then what would you have preferred?" Star asked, never imagining she would need to put the answer into use.

Robin thought about it for a minute and then shrugged. "I don't know. What do you think?"

"Brave," Star answered. "It should say 'brave leader.'"

"Alright. Brave leader it is then."

And so when Robin had slipped from the world again two days ago, Starfire had told her friends she wanted the stone to say "Brave leader" in place of "Courageous leader." And so it had.

As Starfire approached her friends in the parking lot they all glanced away from her, not wanting to catch her eye. Before they all got into the car, Starfire took a moment to look over her friends. Cyborg wore the rings that made him look human, and the black suit he wore had to be custom-made to fit over his robotic limbs. When Beast Boy had asked why he wore the rings, Cyborg had responded that the day was about Robin, and he didn't want people staring at him throughout the service. Raven had worn a black skirt and blouse, but still she wore her cape and hood, which she had kept down during the service but had slipped over her head as soon as it was over, as if to hide her grief. Beast Boy looked uncomfortable, and whether it was because he was wearing a suit and tie, or because he was again at Robin's funeral, Starfire didn't know; she guessed it was both.

The ride home was much like it had been after the first funeral: Quiet, somber, and uncomfortable. Starfire looked out the windows, at the people crossing the streets, and the policemen directing traffic. She wasn't sure if the civilians knew of Robin's death, but she knew for a fact that the policemen did, as they had offered to put double security over the whole city so that the Titans didn't have to fight today. The Jump City Police Captain had also attended the funeral. Thinking about the policemen, Starfire was reminded of the night Robin had, for the second time died.

Two days earlier, just as it was getting dark, the alarm in Titan Tower had sounded, alerting the team to a hostage situation on the edge of the city. The Titans had responded to the call, getting over to the rundown apartment building eight minutes later, and finding that six or seven policemen were also there. After the policemen had filled the Titans in, Robin had elected to try to talk to the criminal, who was holding a woman hostage, threatening to shoot her if anyone got too close or he didn't get his demands: A car, 700,000 dollars, and the release of his friends from prison. So far the police had been too nervous about the hostage's life to do anything, and now Robin told them to let him have a chance. They gave Robin a bullhorn and he took a few steps forward.

"Hey, what's your name?" He called.

"Don't come any closer! I'll shoot her! I swear I will!"

"Okay, okay, calm down," Robin said, and stopped walking. "What's your name?" The conversation had gone much like this for about ten minutes, until Robin announced he was going to start walking forward. As soon as he said this he heard a woman's scream coming from inside the apartment, and then all hell broke loose.

Robin shot out his grappling hook, snagging it onto the window and try to climb up the wall. Behind him the police opened fire, and in front of him the criminal shot back.

The shots had been clean ones. Two directly through the heart, one coming from his back, the other coming from his front. It was impossible to tell if the shot that killed him had come from the police or the criminal. But it didn't really matter how it happened. Either way, Robin was dead.

It had all been so much cleaner than the first time, so much simpler. Of course, how is death ever simple, but the Titans were able to sleep easier knowing all the facts of his death. This time the only mystery was who fired the shot that killed him, and while it still pained the Titans to know their friend and leader was gone, they felt better knowing Slade had had no part in his death.

As soon as the T-car pulled into the garage it started raining again, this time much harder than it had during the funeral. The drops pelted the ground and the Tower, the noise of the collision between the water and the windows reminiscent of gunshots.

When she got in the Tower Starfire turned on every light switch she passed, even those connecting to rooms no one would be in. She wanted light to be everywhere, combating the darkness she felt inside.

Not knowing what to do with herself, Starfire found herself walking the hallways, taking turns just in order to feel herself walk. Soon she could hear thunder outside, and could see lightning reflecting off the windows. A few minutes later the power in the Tower went off, leaving just the monitors in the living room and the infirmary machines active. Long ago, when the team had first formed, Cyborg had connected those machines that needed to be on at all times- the monitor, which alerted them to criminal activity, and the infirmary machines- to a power supply the government had installed specifically for those purposes. Now, although it was only afternoon, the Tower was pitch black, save for the glow from the living room monitor and the lights indicating the medical machines were working. Starfire sighed. So much for lighting up the Tower.

Eventually she found herself in the corridor containing all their rooms. She passed by Beast Boy's, Raven's, and Cyborg's, and paused in front of Robin's. She didn't know what would become of his room, with its stacks of newspaper clippings and evidence. Probably it would be left untouched, only seeing the light of day when one of the Titans ventured in to find a piece of evidence or to stand in the room remembering their fallen leader. She couldn't bear to be alone next to the room, so close to where Robin had lived just days ago. She turned and went into her own room.

The darkness, interspersed with occasional blasts of lightning, created a creepy effect in the alien's bedroom. Shadows fell from behind her furniture, and everything was cold to the touch. Not wanting to think about the situation anymore, Starfire lay down on her bed and fell asleep to the sound of the rain.

**T-B-H-S**

When she awoke it was ten at night. Sitting up on her bed and looking around, she could sense the darkness now was different than that of the darkness when she had fallen asleep. Before it had been caused by the absence of electric lights. Now, though the electricity was still out, the Tower was dark also because the sun had set and the moon had taken its place. It was only when Starfire stood up that she realized how cold it was. Obviously, no one had thought to turn on the heater since coming home. Not bothering to light up a starbolt to help her see, Star pulled open a drawer on her dresser and took out a sweater, pulling it over her head and rubbing her arms to get them warm.

As she opened her door and stepped into the dark hallway, Starfire got the feeling that no one was awake, or that if they were, they were each residing in their own rooms. Walking into the living room, which always seemed vast to her when she was alone, Starfire felt lonely, the loneliest that she had felt since Robin's death. She sunk onto the couch, the glow from the monitor casting a blue light on her face. A clap of thunder made her jump, and for reasons unknown, started her tears afresh.

She held herself as she cried, told herself she had to be strong, that Robin wouldn't want her to cry. But it only made her cry harder, thinking about what Robin had told her after he had died the first time. How he had said he didn't want her to be sad, didn't want her to worry about him. This time, after he was shot, there had been no further words. No drawn out death, just a couple bangs of a gun and bam!- it was over. She told herself he had died quickly, hadn't felt any pain, and in fact that's what Cyborg had said. It had been quick; he probably didn't even feel the shot. Starfire wondered if it was worse to die knowing that it was about to happen, or not knowing anything but life one moment and darkness the next.

It was only when she repeated to herself what she had thought at his funeral that she was able to catch her breath and quiet her crying. Now he wouldn't have to fight anymore. Now he wouldn't have to feel guilt anymore. Now she would never have to lose him again. She sighed, a little more at ease with herself.

The knock on the door startled her more than the thunder had.

It wasn't a knock like any she had heard before. It wasn't exactly ominous, but wasn't urgent either. It was more an excited yet hesitant knock, as if the person on the other side of the door wanted to come in from the rain but didn't know if he was at the right address. Only slightly realizing how strange it was that someone would come to their door at ten thirty at night, without calling first, Starfire got up off the couch and walked over to the door.

When she opened the door the darkness of the night and the power outage made it impossible to see who was there, only that someone of average height was standing in the rain. When the knocker didn't say anything Star squinted her eyes, trying to make out who it was, and if it was friend or foe. She could see that that they were wet- water was dripping off their clothes into a puddle underneath them- and their hands hung nervously beside them. It was only when a streak of lightning crossed the sky that Star was given a full view of the person, and after taking in his pitch black hair, toned figure, and sharp face she heard only her name being called in a very familiar voice before she hit the ground in a dead faint.

* * *

Chapter three is in the bag! 

So for further clearing up, the grave Star was standing at in the beginning of Chapter One was the same grave she was standing at towards the beginning of this chapter, _not_ the grave from Robin's first death. There are two deaths and two graves.

I hope this cleared up confusion, but if it didn't please e-mail or message me and I'll be happy to explain.

Please review- they make me so ridiculously happy! Thanks!


	4. What If?

**Disclaimer: No. I don't. I don't own anything.**

* * *

When Starfire woke up on the couch in the living room the first thing she noticed was that the power was back; the overhead lights and the lights coming from the kitchen blinded her, and she clamped her eyes back shut before slowly opening them again. The second thing she noticed, after she groggily sat up, was that his mask was back on. Back before she had passed out, she had for a split second noticed he wasn't wearing it, but had taken no notice of the shape or color of his eyes. Now the mask was back in place, staring intently at her as she looked from his face to the floor. 

"Hey," he called out. When she didn't respond Robin chuckled a little, trying to lighten the moment. "We've got to stop meeting like this."

Still Star said nothing, clasping and unclasping her hands nervously.

"Star? What's wrong? Other than the obvious, of course." She found herself unable to think of something to say. So many things were going through her head that she found she couldn't pick one. So she picked something that she didn't particularly care about the answer, as long as it bought her a moment to think. "Have you seen the others?"

Robin nodded. "Yeah. After I came inside I went and saw them. They were… Well, you know. It's weird."

"It is very weird."

Robin cocked his head to one side. "Starfire, really. I can explain, as least as much as I remember. I'm sorry I scared you. I didn't really know what to do. I thought it would be better to knock than come inside. I didn't want to give anyone a heart attack."

Starfire looked up at him. "What _did_ happen?"

"It's like last time. I'm fighting some criminal with a hostage and all the sudden I wake up someplace with stitches on my chest. There were two bullet wounds," As if to explain further he held up two fingers and pointed at were they had pierced his skin. "I walk around, trying to find somebody to tell me what's going on, but the place is deserted. I find a TV and switch on the news to see if there was some big catastrophe and the big story is that Robin, leader of the Teen Titans, has died from a bullet to the heart. Then I get nervous that someone is going to find me before I can escape, so I come back here." He took a deep breath.

Starfire shook her head slowly. "I thought you were gone again."

"I know. I'm sorry." She smiled slightly at his words, identical to those that he had spoken the previous year after his first encounter with death. For some reason, thinking about that, she began to cry again, and put her face in her hands, letting the tears seep through her fingers.

"Starfire, don't cry. I'm back. Things are going to be okay. Things are going to be normal again." She felt him wrap his arms around her and she rested her head on his shoulder. But in her mind, the persistent question was, _What is normal anymore?_

She let the tears dry on her cheeks and then stood up, turning to face him. For the second time, she was talking with someone she had never expected to talk with again, looking at someone she never thought she'd lay eyes on again. She should have felt relief to know he was back with her, but for some reason, it felt odd. Each time he left her she felt a little piece of her leaving with him, and when he came back she felt whole again. But how long could this go on for? If you break a plate you can glue the pieces back together, but the more times it breaks, the harder it will be to find all the pieces, until there is nothing left but dust.

"Robin, we need to talk. But not here," Starfire said, motioning to the hallway. He stood up and led her down the hallway, to his bedroom. She sat down on the bed and he sat on the chair next to the desk. Opening her mouth to say something, Starfire found she didn't know what she wanted to say.

"Starfire, what's wrong?" Robin asked, looking concerned.

"I am… surprised." She struggled to find words, and found she didn't have a vocabulary big enough, in either English or Tamaranian, to convey her thoughts.

Robin smiled. "Me, too."

"But I am also feeling guilty."

"Guilty? Why?"

"Because," Starfire stood up and walked over to the window, looking out at the dark sky and the pelting rain. "Because…" She trailed off, looking for a different choice of words. "I never expected to see you again. And I am not strong enough. I cannot keep never expecting to see you again." She glanced over at him before continuing. "One time is too many. Two times… I cannot keep losing you, Robin." She was whispering now, afraid of what she was saying.

Robin was silent for a minute, before responding, "I don't know what to say."

She shook her head. "Neither do I."

"I'm not doing this on purpose," he said quietly. "I don't want this to keep happening. But I don't know what to do." He paused before repeating, "I don't know what to do."

"What if it happens again? What if I lose you again? I don't know what I would do." Star wasn't looking at him, but she could hear him sigh.

"I guess… just assume it isn't real. Assume I'm not really gone."

Now Starfire turned around quickly. "How can I do that? How can I _assume_ you are still alive? What if years pass and I still believe you are alive. And then… What if you _are_ still alive? What if I have to lose you and find you all over again?"

Robin stood up and walked over to her. "Starfire, what do you want me to do?"

In response she shook her head.

Almost five minutes passed before another word was spoken. The two Titans stood side by side next to the window, watching the raindrops fall from the sky. They stood so close to each other that they could feel each other's body heat, and Robin longed to put his arms around her and tell her it would be okay. But he knew that things would never be okay again.

Standing there in silence, Robin realized he should have told her he loved her after he had come back to life the first time. But that was a long time ago. There was no going back now.

"I can't lose you again." She spoke so quietly he almost missed her words. Her voice melded in with the sound of the rain outside. He swallowed. Because he knew what she was saying. She was telling him that in order to never lose him again, she would have to never see him again. His breathing quickened and he tried to think of something to say, but found his mouth was too dry to say anything. Silently, he slipped his arms around her and held her against himself, knowing he would soon be gone from her life forever. A minute later she pulled herself away, her eyes deep with sadness and regret.

"I need to go," she whispered as she walked towards the door. She stopped just before the door, not looking back, but unable to go further. His words were quiet, almost inaudible, but she heard each one as if it was being amplified a hundred times.

"I'll always love you, you know."

"I know." And with that, she turned and left the room, tears spilling from her eyes, her heart breaking into thousands of pieces.

**T-B-H-S**

He left the next day, before she was up. It was barely five in the morning when he called the rest of the team to the living room, where a single bag lay by the door. The rain hadn't stopped, but he had no umbrella, whether it was because he had forgotten to pack one or because he didn't want to shield himself from the rain no one knew.

He told them he was leaving, and when they asked when he would be back, he said never. He was leaving, he told them, because he wanted to be out on his own. He had come up with a new idea for an identity, and would be in touch with them. When they asked if he had told Starfire, he answered that it had been her idea. Someone was about to go get her so they could say goodbye, but he stopped them, saying they had said goodbye last night and he didn't want to wake her. Then he told Cyborg he was officially in charge of the team.

They were so shocked to hear that he was leaving that they were unable to say much of anything. When Robin stood to leave they all stood too, and finally they found their voices. Cyborg and Beast Boy pleaded with him to stay, saying it wasn't his fault that his death had been faked again. Only Raven was silent, able to sense his true feelings and reasons for leaving. Finally, after promising to stay in touch, Robin grabbed his bag and opened the door, not looking back at them.

"Take care of her," he whispered, and then, he was gone.

* * *

Alright, I'm seriously depressing myself. This chapter and the next chapter were actually the scenes I had in mind when creating the story, so I think they're the best ones. Only one chapter left! Also, I want to write another chapter fic, preferably a longer one, but I don't have any ideas. Any suggestions? Please review and I will be eternally grateful- thanks! 


	5. Remembrance

**Disclaimer: Last time! I do not own the Teen Titans.**

**Well, guys, this is it, the last chapter. I'll put a note in at the end but just a head's up so you know. This chapter starts seven years after the end of the last chapter. Also, this does not take into account the events of How Long is Forever?. So, without out further ado, I give you for the last time...**

**The Bleeding Heart Show**

* * *

**Seven Years Later**

Rain poured down from the sky, mixing with the dirt ground to form mud and leaving a damp chill in the air. On a hill just outside of the city, a lone boy stood in the cemetery. The grave he stood at was fresh, the dirt covering the coffin not yet covered with grass. He held an umbrella to keep himself dry, but a few scattered drops of rain still fell on him, dampening his coat and his ebony black hair. Tears pooled in his masked eyes as he read, for the hundredth time, the headstone that had been erected only a couple of hours earlier.

Starfire

1990-2013

Indispensable Teen Titan

Loyal Friend

The funeral had been a couple hours ago, and Robin had come only after everyone else had left, laying a bunch of roses on the grave and standing silently, his eyes playing over the engraved words. After he left he had driven downtown, and now he stood next to a café, waiting for the person he was meeting to show up. It had been seven years since he had left the Titans, seven years since he had seen the Titans, and six and a half years since he had been in constant communication with the whole team. Well, not the whole team. Robin never spoke to Starfire again after that night. Funny enough, the only one he had kept in touch with was Beast Boy.

After Robin had left, he had talked to Cyborg, Raven, and Beast Boy about once a week, for about six months. But when Cyborg and Raven had realized how strained the relationship between them and their former leader had become, they stopped trying to push it, and eventually, he stopped talking to them all together. But Beast Boy, surprisingly, or not surprisingly, felt the loss more than the other two did. He was the youngest member of the team, and when Robin left he had lost not only a friend but a mentor. Robin had been surprised to find that Beast Boy had continued writing to him once a week after the others stopped, but soon he began sending the changeling regular letters, too.

Beast Boy had helped Robin design the Nightwing costume, but because Robin never told him his real name, and because Nightwing was long, he continued to call him Robin. From his written dialogue with Beast Boy Robin was able to stay up to date with what was going on in the Tower. Cyborg had created new robotic limbs that were sleeker and stronger, Raven had taken Cyborg's place as second in command, Beast Boy was trying to find time to take classes at the local college, and Starfire… Beast Boy's letter always got hurried when he got to the parts about her. In the only letter Robin had written mentioning her, he had told Beast Boy his true reasons for leaving, and had asked him to watch over her. After that Beast Boy mentioned her in every letter, even though Robin never asked.

It was a letter he had written two years ago in the fall that had almost sent Robin into hysterics.

_Robin,_

_Starfire is getting married. I'm sorry to say it so bluntly, but there's no way to sugarcoat it. His name is Phillip, and they've been dating for six or seven months. I've never mentioned him before because I thought it would blow over, and I didn't want you to worry. The date is two months from now. I'm sorry._

_Beast Boy_

Robin hadn't responded to that letter, and in fact had been nervous to open the next letter he received. But when he finally did open it three days after it arrived, he felt a mix of relief and guilt wash over him to find that the wedding had been canceled. No reason had been given.

"Hey, Rob." Robin's head snapped up upon hearing his name and he turned to see someone he hadn't seen in seven years standing beside him, still wearing his suit from the funeral. Had he not had green skin and hair, Robin wasn't sure he would have recognized the shape shifter. It was his face mostly. His eyes, once so full of excitement and youth, now looked serious and sad. But still, Robin could see the glint of mischief somewhere back there. Robin smiled.

"Good to see you."

Beast Boy nodded. "Yeah, you, too." Both boys' eyes fell now, as they remembered the reason they had decided to meet. After a moment Robin spoke up.

"Why don't we sit down?" After they had taken a seat in an empty corner of the café and had ordered and received hot drinks, Robin sighed. "I'm sorry I haven't been in touch much lately." The past month, even before hearing about Starfire two days ago, Robin had been busy and hadn't had a chance to respond to Beast Boy's letters. When he had answered the phone the day before yesterday to hear Beast Boy on the other end, he was surprised and instantly worried.

"_Beast Boy? Is that you? What's wrong?"_

_Silence._

"_Beast Boy, what happened?"_

"_Starfire died, Robin."_

_Silence._

Beast Boy shook his head. "No, it's okay. We've all been busy." He paused before continuing. "How do you like being solo? Being Nightwing?"

Robin sighed. "It's fine. I miss the team." Robin looked up and met Beast Boy's eye. "You guys have done well, though."

Beast Boy shrugged. "I guess. But it's different. At first it was weird, for a year or two. But now it's just different." Robin nodded. He understood. The team had moved on.

"Beast Boy, how did it happen?"

Said Boy raised an eyebrow, confused. "You left. We couldn't stop you."

Robin shook his head as he spoke. "No, that's not what I mean. I know why I left. I mean… How did… it happen?"

Then Beast Boy understood. He spoke quietly. "You never knew?"

"I didn't want to read it in the paper. I wanted to hear it from one of you."

Beast Boy swallowed. How were you supposed to tell one of your best friends about the death of the girl he had loved and left for?

"Two days ago," Beast Boy began, avoiding Robin's gaze, "She went out in the evening, at seven or eight o'clock. She bought a car a few years back and she said she wanted to drive that evening instead of fly. She said something about not being happy enough to fly or something. It was raining that night, and we got a call from her around eleven. She said she was coming back to the Tower, and she would be home in ten minutes. But an hour passed and she still didn't come home and then we got another call." A tear slipped down Beast Boy's cheek and he looked up. Robin nodded, urging him to continue. "It was the police. They said there had been a car accident and to come down right away. We got there as fast as we could. But by the time we got there… It was too late, Robin. The paramedics said she died instantly. She didn't feel anything at all."

"How did she crash?" Robin asked softly.

"It was raining really hard, and she didn't drive a lot, and we think she couldn't see the cars coming towards her. It was head on. The other driver broke a lot of bones but lived."

Robin nodded. He hadn't wanted to picture it, but he needed to hear it. He needed to know how it happened. Then a sudden thought made his breath catch. Two days earlier, that would have been… Seven years to the day he had left the team. Obviously Robin wasn't the only one who had figured that out.

"It's not your fault, Robin," Beast Boy said. "She wasn't used to driving. We shouldn't have let her go out alone when it was raining."

Robin laughed, a sad chuckle. "Who would have thought she'd go before me?"

Beast Boy didn't know what to say, so he sat silently, sipping his coffee. Finally he spoke up. "You could have come to the funeral, you know. No one would have minded."

But Robin shook his head. "No. It was for her. I would have just distracted people." Beast Boy shivered at his words, recalling Cyborg using the same line at Robin's second funeral.

Ten or twenty minutes passed, and the two former teammates exchanged small talk, talking about everything except the team and Starfire. Finally Beast Boy looked at his watch and then back at Robin. "I have to go. I told them I'd be back soon." Robin nodded and they both stood up. A thought occurred to Robin.

"Do they know you were meeting me?"

"No," Beast Boy said simply. "I wasn't sure if you wanted them to know."

"You can tell them. I don't care."

Beast Boy thought for a moment and then said, "You know, you could come back to the team now. Now that… Well, I mean, if you wanted to come back, I'm sure you could."

Robin smiled but shook his head. "No. I have my own thing now. I can't come back." Beast Boy nodded. As they walked outside they made a silent pact to leave certain things unsaid, such as the great possibility that since two of the members had left, the Titans may not last much longer.

When they got outside Beast Boy opened his umbrella and stuck out his hand. "It was good seeing you."

"Yeah," Robin agreed, shaking Beast Boy's hand, "We should keep in touch."

"I'll see you around then."

"Bye." Robin raised one hand in a departing gesture and turned to go when he heard Beast Boy's voice again.

"She didn't love him, you know."

Robin turned back to face him. "She didn't love who?"

"Phillip. That guy she was going to marry. She was just lonely."

"Did he love her?"

Beast boy shrugged. "I don't know. He liked her a lot and thought she was pretty, but love might be too strong a word." He met Robin's eyes then. "She always loved you."

Robin took a deep breath and turned away. "I'll see you around."

**T-B-H-S**

What are you supposed to say when someone tells you the girl you loved, who has died after years of not seeing you, loved you? What are you supposed to do? There are few words adequate to express what the feelings are.

Robin had found long ago that words and tears were not nearly powerful enough to express his feelings for Starfire. After he left the team he had stopped talking about her, hadn't even written about her. His head was always full of thoughts about her, but those thoughts were never associated with words, and never saw the light of day. Sometimes, he found, silence was the only way to express the magnitude of certain emotions.

* * *

Sigh. I'm feeling very mixed emotions right now. I had so much fun writing and posting this, but I'm glad I've finally gotten it all up. I hope you guys liked reading it as much as I liked writing it! 

Also, I figuredI should say this: I got the title of this story from the song of the same name by The New Pornographers. The feeling of the song is the same feeling I get from this story- that in the end everything is sort of resolved but no one's happy.

I've got an idea fortwo stories,butthey probably won't be up for a while. I'll probably post some more oneshots, though.

And last but certainly not least: **_Thank you so much to everyone who has reveiwed. _**You guys were the reason I was posting! So, for old time's sake, please reveiw and I will be eternally grateful.

See you next time...

-Alibi2014


End file.
